Okay... brace yourselves. This one is kinda' mean. (As if soooo many other posts weren't). PilotHusband quit smoking 2 years ago. Good for him! I am very proud and pleased that he made a healthy choice to insure he would be around for many years to come. But in lieu of cigarettes, he has substituted food as his drug of choice. And now he is.... well.... sort of.... kinda'... well... FAT.
So, PilotHusband is so fat...
He tried to rock himself out of bed, and ended up rocking himself back to sleep.
When he says he flies a wide body... he's not talking about the aircraft.
When we go to the beach, Green Peace shows up and shoves him in the water, trying to save his life.
Golden Corral installed speed bumps to try to slow him down.
He chased down a school bus full of white kids, screaming "Stop that Twinkie!".
When he turns around, people throw him a "Welcome Back" Party.
He beeps when he walks backwards.
Because he is in the right seat, Gate Agents have to fill the left side of the aircraft to avoid weight and balance issues.
He doesn't have belly button lint... he has SWEATERS.
Bless his heart, he tries. But, I think I need to start hiding the ice cream... and the chips.... and the pasta... and the candy.
So, PilotHusband is so fat...
He tried to rock himself out of bed, and ended up rocking himself back to sleep.
When he says he flies a wide body... he's not talking about the aircraft.
When we go to the beach, Green Peace shows up and shoves him in the water, trying to save his life.
Golden Corral installed speed bumps to try to slow him down.
He chased down a school bus full of white kids, screaming "Stop that Twinkie!".
When he turns around, people throw him a "Welcome Back" Party.
He beeps when he walks backwards.
Because he is in the right seat, Gate Agents have to fill the left side of the aircraft to avoid weight and balance issues.
He doesn't have belly button lint... he has SWEATERS.
Bless his heart, he tries. But, I think I need to start hiding the ice cream... and the chips.... and the pasta... and the candy.
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