Monday, October 15, 2012

TOILET PAPER AND SOAP

PilotHusband has been home for 21 straight days now.  Let that sink in for a moment.... 21 days in a row of watching him lay on the couch, drink beer, and watch the Military Channel.  I did NOT sign up for this.  This marriage works because for the past 17 years, one of us leaves every week!  So besides the obvious tension in the house, another phenomenon has occurred.... we ran out of toilet paper, soap, and shampoo.

Ever since PilotHusband's first overnight as a professional Pilot, we have not had to purchase toilet paper, soap, or shampoo.  At every hotel, each week, PilotHusband took the toilet paper, tiny bars of soap, and little bottles shampoo, home with him.  If the housekeeping cart was left unattended.... he stocked up.  So for 17 years, I have had to enjoy/endure single ply toilet paper, tiny bars of hotel soap, and minuscule bottles of shampoo.

Obviously, after 3 weeks at home, our supplies ran out.  For the first time in 17 years, I had to go to the market and purchase toilet paper.  WOW!  Do you know how many kinds of toilet paper are available?  There's toilet paper with ridges, toilet paper with aloe and vitamin E, toilet paper that is made, entirely, from recycled content.  I was overwhelmed.  Should I buy the squeezably soft kind, the environmentally friendly kind, the moisturized kind.... the possibilities were endless.

After 20 minutes in the toilet paper department, I moved on to soap.  Holy Shamoly!  Have you been in the soap aisle lately?  The bars are HUGE!  There were moisturizing bars, antibacterial bars, anti aging bars, scented bars, unscented bars.... I began to shut down.  Too many choices, after years of deprivation, got the best of me.

Next, I had to endure purchasing shampoo.  WTF?  Do I have oily hair?  Dry hair?  Frizzy hair?  Damaged hair?  Hard to manage  hair?  Itchy scalp hair?  Dandruff?  I don't know!  For 17 years I have washed my hair with whatever came out of the little tiny bottle that came out of PilotHusband's suitcase and found it's way into my shower.

No disrespect to the people of Sweden, but clearly, I have Stockholm Syndrome.  There are too many choices regarding toilet paper, soap, and shampoo.  PilotHusband REALLY has to go back to work.  I can't handle another trip to the market.

2 comments:

  1. Ha ha ha ha ha ... I can soooooo relate (as a fellow pilot's wife). The only difference in our house is that he never takes the tp (I'd wring his neck) and I give away all the mini's to a local charity (much to his chagrin). I keep a handfull for the guest bath, but that's it. Love your blog. Send him packing and keep writing!

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  2. Most commonly, you will find the more inexpensive two piece toilets, with the bowl and tank being two separate connected pieces.

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