Blissfully, I awoke this morning to find PilotHusband had departed for a three day trip. While I suppose I should miss him when he is gone... I found myself doing a "happy dance". It is not out of a lack of love, or affection, or appreciation that I celebrate his absence. It's just that he does things when he's home too long that require him to leave again before he causes a Brain Aneurysm and my head explodes.
Without further ado, here are the reasons I'm glad PilotHusband is on a trip....
1. He's watched so many hours of the Military Channel this week, there is a permanent "M" logo burned into the bottom right corner of our tv screen, no matter what channel you are watching.
2. After proclaiming he is on the Adkin's Diet, PilotHusband has eaten all of the ice cream, macaroni and cheese, and potato chips in the house... causing our five-year-old to say "Sierra Hotel India Tango! Daddy ate everything AGAIN!".
3. After much complaining on my part about countless hours of Military Channel viewing, PilotHusband discovered the 12 hour marathon of JAG reruns on another network!
4. Our computer can now be used for something other than reading Airline Pilot Central forums.
5. I can listen to something other than Rush Limbaugh on the car radio.
6. For the next three days, I can take a long hot shower without being startled by PilotHusband asking me where he can find; his cell phone charger, his cell phone, his favorite socks, his favorite sweatshirt, the tv remote, the cordless phone, the printout of his schedule, or the five-year-old. (I swear it's like living with Norman Bates).
7. Finally, two words... farting and snoring.
So my fellow AngryPilotWives, enjoy these small breaks between the chaos. And for all you PilotHusbands out there; have a safe trip. We'll be home celebra... er, I mean, missing you terribly.
Without further ado, here are the reasons I'm glad PilotHusband is on a trip....
1. He's watched so many hours of the Military Channel this week, there is a permanent "M" logo burned into the bottom right corner of our tv screen, no matter what channel you are watching.
2. After proclaiming he is on the Adkin's Diet, PilotHusband has eaten all of the ice cream, macaroni and cheese, and potato chips in the house... causing our five-year-old to say "Sierra Hotel India Tango! Daddy ate everything AGAIN!".
3. After much complaining on my part about countless hours of Military Channel viewing, PilotHusband discovered the 12 hour marathon of JAG reruns on another network!
4. Our computer can now be used for something other than reading Airline Pilot Central forums.
5. I can listen to something other than Rush Limbaugh on the car radio.
6. For the next three days, I can take a long hot shower without being startled by PilotHusband asking me where he can find; his cell phone charger, his cell phone, his favorite socks, his favorite sweatshirt, the tv remote, the cordless phone, the printout of his schedule, or the five-year-old. (I swear it's like living with Norman Bates).
7. Finally, two words... farting and snoring.
So my fellow AngryPilotWives, enjoy these small breaks between the chaos. And for all you PilotHusbands out there; have a safe trip. We'll be home celebra... er, I mean, missing you terribly.
So true! My pilot has been doing 10 on 4 off I told him not to bother coming home for the 4 it makes things more complicated!
ReplyDeleteWhen he's doing absolutely nothing around here; I'll just glance at my watch and say "I Think its time to pack your bags"...he gets the gist :) LOL
DeleteI generally welcome all comments, but I've deleted an anonymous one suggesting that I divorce my husband so "he has a chance to find someone who isn't so completely self-absorbed and maybe loves him for all that he is". In additon to "STFU" it was suggested that my blog makes "other women feel like they've made a bad choice".
ReplyDeleteTo review, my PilotHusband helps me with the blog, suggesting stories and topics, and reads every post usually before they are published. THIS IS HUMOR, PEOPLE. After 20 years together (since flight hour ZERO), we can laugh at each other WITH LOVE.
If PilotHusband wants to start a blog entitled SH!T MY WINE GUZZLING WIFE SCREWED UP, he is more than welcome to. I'd give him a list of topics. But he won't... because it would cut into his time in front of the tv, watching the Military Channel. Maybe after raising money for FriendsOfMel, we can find a charity for people with no sense of humor.
How funny! My husband thinks I am the only one that feels this way!
ReplyDeleteThat was my wife above, I think. We both think it's funny---no need for profanity or insults to the Blog writer...keep up the good work and entertaining posts!
ReplyDeleteRegards,
PilotWhoMakesWifeAngryandWantsHimToGoToWorksoSheCanDoThingsUninterrupted!
Thank you kind Sir! I am glad you BOTH enjoy the blog. Please share it with like-minded Pilot Families who keep the FUNin dysFUNction.
Delete